So, I grew up a tom-boy, and as such I often have boyish behavior - particularly when I am alone with my husband. Often I like to initiate wrestling matches, tickle fights, and I also enjoy smacking his butt. To me, he is so much more than my husband, he's also my friend. As explained in Prom Night, we have a long history. We rough-house often and neither of us like to lose.
So, the reason I bring this up is because my husband usually winds up on the short end of the stick when it comes to us playing. I inadvertently scratch him, or make him strain or sprain something, and when we wrestle and I'm losing I threaten to grab his nuts and squash them. You heard me. I don't like to lose. When he gets hurt, I always feel bad, but I like to win more than I care about feeling bad - I mean, intellectually that isn't true, but in the heat of the moment I never think straight. My husband is a gentle soul, and he usually just lets me bowl him over, but occasionally he likes to show his dominance. When he does this, rarely do I feel like he's hurt me. To me, we're like two tiger cubs batting each other around.
Lately though, I've been thinking that I need to quit this behavior because it just seems so immature even if we are alone and no one (until now) knows that we do this. The thing about it is that after we rough-house I always feel so much closer to him on a human level, not a husband and wife level; it reminds me of playing with my brothers when I was a child.
What do you all think? Is this wrong?
Tomorrow, My Loves, Inspired By Accidental Miracles. . .
Whatever keeps you close!
ReplyDeleteThanks Rosaria :)
ReplyDeleteI understand what you mean. We want a friend and buddy in our spouse.
ReplyDeleteRosaria is right. we all have our own way of finding closenss.
Thanks Munir - I actually lost a follower because of this post - I think it was the whole squeezing nuts thing - but fyi, my husband says if i had nuts he threaten to squash them so i know what it feels like :)
ReplyDeletePandora, I think you are doing what works for you. You may feel imature at times but the way I see it, you are simply cementing your relationship in a way that makes it real for you. And you know what else I think, what YOU do, with YOUR husband, in YOUR own place, when it is only the TWO of YOU, matters only TO the TWO of YOU.
ReplyDeleteEvery strong, loving relationship is kind of like a secret language that only the two hold the key to. You don't need to explain anymore than you should feel bad if you like strawberry ice cream and the rest of the world likes chocolate. It makes me so happy to know that you have your husband and that your relationship is strong. And whatever makes it work is what is right for YOU!
thanks Susan, I particularly felt bad when I lost a blog follower after this post :(
ReplyDelete